Bob Ross Breakfast of Champions

I'll start putting some of my meals on this blog, so you skinny blogging buffoonery motherfuckers can copy the diet of a real boss hog, candy paint, riding clean ass sum'bitch. You aren't going to get 20 inch biceps of steel sitting there eating your raisin bran muffins and skim milk. These are going to be real meals, full of carbs, proteins, and afro-nutrients to keep your energy peaking to bang multiple chicks throughout the day while you save babies from burning buildings and shit.

WHAT YOU WILL NEED FOR MY BREAKFAST PLATTER OF GODLINESS (Note: My measurements are how real alpha males measure shit, women need not apply and should exit this blog immediately to fix me sandwiches.)

1. -A big ass Russett Potato, cut it how you like
2. -Half-a-dozen large eggs, including yolks, that's right
3. -Half of a Vidalia Onion, minced (that means chop the fuck out of it.. if you cry, you aren't allowed to eat this.)
4. -Minced Tomato & Green Chilies, or just use a can of Rotel
5. -Enough cheese (Cheddar & Jack) to cover the top layer of my sexy platter
6. -BACON (need I say more?)
7. -Salt & Pepper to taste
8. -Hot Sauce for a vinegary, spicy kick in the face.
9. -A splash of oil, or bacon grease to cook potatoes in

(servings 4-5 for normal people.. 1-2 for hungry lumberjacks)

Coat the 'taters in oil, salt & pepper them. Potatoes without salt is like taking a dump without wiping. Not cool

When your potatoes start getting a little brown, let your onions have an orgy with them.  Your bacon should be cooking or almost done by now.

After those potatoes and onions have browned a little more, add your 6 eggs, tomatoes, chilies, bacon. Stir them all together like so.  All of this is on medium heat in a non-stick pan, so if you don't have a non-stick pan, you better lube it up with bacon grease.

When eggs thicken up, add your layer of cheese to melt over the top.

Serve it up with biscuits. Twas nothing fancy, just something good and hearty you can whip up in like 15 minutes when you're feeling a tad peckish. 

That's your breakfast for this morning, add salsa, hot sauce, whatever the fuck it is that your taste buds desire. 

Enjoy your meal.

New York Style Pizza Vs. Chicago Style Pizza?



Q: Which style is the best? 

A: There is no correct answer, since this has been debated for years. We'll see what the blogger community thinks.

New York Style

New York Style Pizza is known for its thinly kneaded dough, basic toppings, an evenly spread ladle of Marinara, and a hefty layer of cheese on top. The slices are generally as big as a blanket and about as flimsy, so most people fold it in half and eat it like an Italian taco. If you piled a ton of toppings and sauce on such a thin layer of dough, it'd ruin this pizza's pizazz. Its simplicity is the essence of why it's so good. It's the perfect food for people on the run or after a late night drinking.



Chicago Style



Chicago Style Pizza is literally a "pizza pie", since it's stuffed full of ingredients inside a deep dish dough, then it's covered in cheese and finally overlaid with a thick Marinara Sauce. A much heartier pizza that will fill your gut after only a slice or two. If you like a thick crust with an array of ingredients and gooey cheese, this is your pizza. This is a perfect sit down for dinner type pizza.

The New Yorker's are always going to say "If I wanted some lasagna, I'd go down to Mario's over dea on da corna."

The Chicagoans are always going to say "If I wanted some cardboard, I'd go pull some out of the dumpster."

Let me know what you think  is the best and I'll tally up the winner from the comments left on this blog.

I'm not going to give you my personal preference on the pizzas, to keep it unbiased.